How to reset your motivation

Unless you're some kind of superhuman, I think motivation (or more specifically lack of), is a problem that affects us all from time to time. For me this has been a huge issue in the past, and it seems to become a vicious cycle; your motivation dips, which reduces productivity, which reduces motivation even more, and so on. The longer we let this cycle continue, the harder it becomes to break. Luckily, over my many years of demotivation and self-pity, I've discovered a few strategies that help me break free from the dreaded motivational block. Here are my top 3 strategies for claiming back your motivation:

1. Lists.

This is my number one secret weapon when it comes to regaining my motivation. I think one of the biggest factors that contribute to losing our drive is feeling like everything is too much. For me at least, feeling like I have more to do than I can handle causes me to shut everything out, not wanting to do anything at all. When you feel like something is impossible, your brain starts thinking 'well what's the point', causing you to feel physically and mentally deflated. When I find myself in this situation, the first thing I'll do is write lists - as many as I need, literally just write every single thing down. I find it helps to put everything down on paper because it gets it out of your head, helping you to think more clearly. It's surprising how motivating having a list is; it makes things seem much simpler because once you have it down, you can just work through it one at a time without the added stress of juggling everything in your mind. Don't think about the next thing, just go through it one by one at whatever pace works for you and soon enough, once you realise your productivity is increasing, that motivation will creep back too. I find the feeling of crossing things off to-do lists so motivating. It's up to you how you do your lists - personally I like to make them all fancy and colour-coded, but whatever works best for you.

2. Reset and restart.

This is another really effective strategy I use. Sometimes, the 'I'll start tomorrow' excuse can actually be useful (as long as you're not doing it every day)! A lot of the time running out of motivation is due to burning out and doing too much. This causes stress, which in turn causes the 'head in the sand' sort of attitude that comes with lack of motivation. In this case, I often just say to myself 'chill out, and start a fresh tomorrow'. When you're feeling demotivated, there's sometimes nothing better than having a cuppa and a long bath, reading a book and getting a good nights sleep to change your mind-set and revive your energy. Get relaxed and rested, get up in the morning with a (hopefully) fresh attitude, write yourself some to-do lists and get going.

3. Think of the bigger picture

In other cases, lack of motivation can be caused by the feeling that all your efforts are 'getting you nowhere'. When this happens, I find it helpful to take a breather and a step back, and look at the bigger picture. Working out is a great example of this. Day to day, you don't particularly see results. Personally, this can sometimes leave me feeling a little bit deflated; to put your absolute all into your gym sessions and feel like you're getting nothing from it is really disheartening. At this point, I motivate myself by looking at the big picture. I get my progress pictures up and soon realise that I of course HAVE made progress, it's just a slow process and you don't notice every tiny bit of extra muscle or loss of fat. I think this technique can benefit in so many situations. For example at college you may be in the habit of thinking 'I won't do this exam question, it's only one question, it won't make a difference'. However in the long run, doing one becomes two, and two becomes four, and so on, and you realise that a series of small progressions leads to a much bigger progression. In other words - the bigger picture. Remember that every small action counts and allow that to give meaning to all those stupid little tasks you don't want to do because they feel 'pointless'.

Why we should stop waiting for 'the right time'

We've all been there; sat thinking about what we want to achieve, and how amazing it will be when we do it. I'd love to count the number of times I've psyched myself up ready to smash my goals, but when it comes down to it I've just come up with excuse after excuse, essentially ending up achieving nothing.

The biggest excuse (lie) I have told myself over and over again is 'it's not the right time', 'I'll do it once exams are over' or 'I'll do it in the new year'. I doubt I'm the only one who's said this to themselves, for the simple reason that it 'not being the right time' is an incredibly versatile excuse, that can be used whenever we want. Here's the thing though - we always have something we're busy with. We rationalise our putting off of activities by thinking that after something in particular is finished, we'll have a clear schedule and the timing will be perfect. The stars will align, everything will fall into place and we will easily achieve our goals. However, I guarantee this is a plan that will never work, because however much we plan for life, the 'right time' never comes. Really it's just a lie we tell ourselves as a cover-up; simply to make us feel better and to justify why we're not doing what we want to be doing. The simple reality is, we're not doing it because we don't want to. We're not doing it because although the idea seems great, when it comes down to it we realise that the thing we want to achieve is actually not that easy. We say it's not the right time because we are giving up before we've even begun.

Of course, there is a simple solution to this predicament - just do it. That thing that you've been putting off for months or even years because now's not the right time; because you'll do it after exams, or you'll start on Monday. Get up right now, and do it. I think half of the time we put things off so we can keep the idealistic image of how great it will be. In a way, it's a method of protecting ourselves from disappointment. However, everything worth doing takes time, effort and often a hell of a lot of frustration or disappointment. By putting things off I think we're subconsciously trying to protect ourselves from this, whereas in reality it only makes us more frustrated. So next time you're sat there thinking 'I will start the gym next year' or 'I will start revising on Monday', put aside the excuses and ask yourself if there really is any reason you can't do it now.

Standing up and just going for it can be a daunting prospect, but I guarantee the alternative is much scarier. However busy you are, if you have an ambition it's so important to make time for it; you will thank yourself in the future.

Inspiring reads

Reading is a pastime I've only really fallen in love with in the past year or so. I would say my favourite genre is quite specific; books which are not necessarily self-help, but that still inspire me to improve myself, or that simply offer a positive outlook on life. Here are a few of my favourites:

• 'Confessions of a conjuror' and 'Tricks of the mind', both by Derren Brown. Two or three years ago, Derren Brown's stage show 'Infamous' left me both confused as hell (as you would expect), but also, to my surprise, absolutely uplifted and inspired. His ability to entwine classic 'magic tricks' with such inspiring philosophy had me hooked, and I immediately ordered these two books. 'Confession of a conjuror' is an autobiography, and without a doubt Derren's personality is projected directly onto the pages; the fact that the book is so in depth and at times hard to follow is what makes it so special. Despite being absolutely jam-packed with wisdom, this is also the only book that has ever made me laugh out loud. A genius mix of deep thoughts, comedy and personality. 'Tricks of the mind' is similarly witty, but focuses more on hypnosis, communication and 'thinking traps'. The last part of this book completely made me rethink my own though processes, and absolutely for the better. Once I finish the book I'm currently reading, I will be making a start on Derren Brown's newest book, 'Happy', which I don't doubt will be equally inspiring.

Favourite quote: "Each of us is leading a difficult life, and when we meet people we are seeing only a tiny part of the thinnest veneer of there complex, troubled existences. To practice anything but kindness towards them, to treat them in any way save generously, is to quietly deny their humanity." - Confessions of a conjuror.

• 'Staying strong 365 days a year' by Demi Lovato. This is a book that I haven't actually picked up in a while, which is probably because I know it off by heart by now! This was the first inspirational book I ever bought, when I was in a very dark place. This book guided me through that period of time and for that it will always have a special place in my heart. Each page consists of the date, a quote, Demi's thoughts on the quote and a goal for the day. 'Staying strong' was written after Demi's recovery from drug and alcohol addiction, and she is clearly wise beyond her years. I always folded the corners of my favourite pages, but at this point almost all of them are folded. This is probably because every page is without a doubt relevant to all of us at different points in our lives.

Favourite quote: "The pain always passes, but the beauty that comes from your transformation will last forever."

• 'Beautiful' by Katie Piper. This book is truly incredible. Documenting the physical and mental trauma in the aftermath of a horrendous attack, and Katie's journey which led her to become the beautiful woman she is today, this book is so moving. It really demonstrates how it is possible to get through anything. Katie has since wrote more books, which I definitely plan on investing in.

Favourite quote: "I'd learned that kindness and love are the most wonderful things of all, and from that moment on I knew my life was going to be beautiful, in every single way."

• 'Strong looks better naked' by Khloé Kardashian. It's no secret that I'm a huge fan of all the Kardashian women, but Khloé in particular motivates me to be the best person I can be. Her book is incredible. Split into three sections - 'mind', 'body', and 'heart', it just about covers everything. This is by far the most motivational book I have ever read, and I credit reading it as a true turning point for me. It helped me realise the huge relation between mind, body and soul. I 100% wouldn't have began my fitness journey without it, either. If you are in need of some serious motivation, or want a book to generally make you feel sassy AF, then this is the read for you.

Favourite quote: "If you're doing it to make yourself happy, you'll succeed. Success is a choice."

Why 'winging it' is the way forward

This may seem a little hypocritical, coming from a girl who prides herself on her borderline obsessive organisation skills, but one of the most valuable lessons I’ve learnt recently is that not having everything planned out is not always a bad thing.

To me, it feels as though as long as I remember, knowing what we wanted in our lives was of utmost importance; if we didn’t have our every move planned out, we would fail miserably and end up ‘working in the co-op’. On a side note, I’ve never really been sure why the co-op always seems to have been the synonym for having ‘failed’ – I mean, I can think of much less pleasant jobs out there, but whatever. Even in primary school it was, ‘revise hard for these SATs! They will influence which set you get put in which will influence what grade you get which will influence your GCSEs which will influence your career which will influence your ENTIRE LIFE!’ I distinctly remember at every ‘milestone’ in school being wholeheartedly assured that this, in fact, is THE most important, defining moment of our education; that once this stage is over, we are set for life.

In reality, none of it matters. Well, of course, it kind of does, but none of it is as important as we are led to believe. Having our entire life mapped is also relatively unimportant. Having a plan is great, and if you know what you want to do then good on you, go for it. But similarly, NOT having a plan is also great in its own way. I think sometimes when we have all these rigid plans mapped out for ourselves, it can be counter-productive, because you narrow your options. The realisation came to me through first-hand experience. Admittedly, I am a bit of a control freak in certain ways. Whilst doing my GCSEs, I decided I wanted to be a Psychologist. I chose my A-Levels based on this goal, and suddenly felt as though there was no going back. I thought it was already too late to change my mind, and I was trapped. I think the whole notion of being made to feel like we need to have our lives all planned out was partly to blame. This and my own need for order and stability were a recipe for disaster. I applied for university, to study Psychology. I visited open days, wrote my personal statement despite knowing deep down that it wasn’t right for me. I masked the truth completely, simply because the alternative was too frightening. The thought of having no idea what I was doing terrified me. The whole application process was incredibly stressful because I felt as though I had to pretend this was still what I wanted to do. I was going through the motions but had no passion or drive; I knew I wasn’t going to university but was too scared to admit it. Having received 5 offers I realised I had to at some point face up to my true feelings, but I put it off as long as possible. The day before my offers expired, I logged onto UCAS and declined all of them. But surprisingly, it didn’t feel like the end. It felt like the beginning.

I realised there and then that the best way to live life is honestly. Stay true to yourself, it’s ok to not know what you’re doing. In fact, it’s great. Having no rigid plans keeps you open to any opportunity that may present itself. No matter what anyone may lead you to believe, if you’re still figuring out what your purpose is, it’s ok. Let go of the stress and go where your heart naturally takes you, and it will come to you eventually. Alternatively, if you are stuck in a similar position to the one I was in, don’t let it make you miserable any longer. Take control, change what you’re doing and move on. It’s never too late. I have now applied for Events Management and university and feel so happy and excited about my choice. Even though this was something I’d never even considered before, when I let go of the pressure I was putting myself under, my heart naturally led me to where it wanted to be. Once you clear your mind, everything becomes simpler.