How to make going to the gym a habit

Seen as this month marks a year since I joined the gym, I thought this would be a fitting post. The fact that it's been a whole year (YEAR!!) really has got me thinking about what was different this time round. I'd tried getting into exercise countless times before, but never stuck it out. It's so easy to get caught in the trap of having all this motivation, spending months planning how you're going to join the gym. Next thing you know you've done 1 or 2 sessions, realised you don't have abs yet and are beginning to feel that motivation fade. I've been there more times than I count! In this year, however, I've picked up a few little tricks on how to keep that drive to succeed fresh. Here are a few of those sneaky little lessons - I really hope they can be of help to someone out there!

1. Get a membership

Twice I have fallen into the "I won't get a membership to start with" trap. Yes, in theory, not committing to paying a lump sum before you're sure you'll use it makes perfect sense. It does, however, make you less likely to stick at it. Firstly, if you know that every time you go to the gym, you have to physically rake 5 or 6 pounds out your pocket, the idea suddenly becomes less appealing (as if it wasn't hard enough already). Even though with a membership you're still technically paying, it's easier than literally forking out cash every time you visit the gym. Secondly, paying on the door can make you feel like you have to spend ages there in order to get your 'money's worth'. If you have a membership, you can say to yourself "OK, I'll just go for half an hour" and not feel bad for it, whereas if you're using pay as you go, you're way more likely to just bail altogether.

2. Start slowly

There's no need to go in and do Tammy Hembrow style workouts immediately! In the beginning, making the gym part of your routine is hard, and there's no shame whatsoever in easing yourself into it. When I started out, the first few weeks were all about motivating myself to actually turn up, trying out different things and finding out what I enjoyed. Don't beat yourself up for allowing time to just give things a go before going for the challenging, structured workouts.

3. Know there's no need to feel intimidated

When I first joined the gym, I was terrified; the thought of exercising in front of others filled me with what can only be described as pure dread. I was scared that people would look at me and judge me for only being able to lift the small weights, and I wouldn't try any new machines in case I made a fool of myself. It's OK to feel like this at the start; stepping out of your comfort zone isn't easy, but you'll soon begin to realise that nobody actually cares what you're doing, just as you don't care what they're doing. Everyone is there for their own reasons, and nobody is going to care or judge you if you mess something up. In my year at the gym, I've seen people helping each other out countless times - it's no big deal and there certainly isn't any judgement involved. This girl who a year ago was scared to even move in the gym is now the one you'll see smashing out sumo squats in the middle of the floor (not such a dignified sight, but who even cares? No-one!)

4. Focus on how you feel

It's easy to get caught up in the physical results, but I really do think this often does more harm than good. Physical results are slow, but the mental benefits can be felt almost immediately. Focusing on how going to the gym makes you feel, and realising the power of these benefits is so much more motivational than getting hung up on physical qualities. Treating the gym as somewhere to go to make you feel great is truly the best way forward, and any physical changes are just a pleasant side effect.

5. Don't sweat the details

Hands up who has ever missed a day or week at the gym and given up there and then, taking it as a sign of failure? I've certainly done this many a time. The truth is, though, that missing a week at the gym doesn't matter, it's how you decide to interpret it that does. Sticking to a strict routine isn't what will make you succeed in getting fit, it's the resilience to keep going even if things don't always go to plan. Yes, I occasionally miss a week in the gym - life happens. Sometimes you're just too busy, or you simply feel demotivated or under the weather. It doesn't matter! What matters is picking yourself up and going again. I have skipped plenty of workouts, yet their effect on my fitness is negligible. If, however, I'd used this as an excuse to give up completely, I'd be right back to square one. Alternatively, if some days you don't feel like going but want to try, just go for half an hour or so - what matters is that you went and you did something. We all have bad days, and teaching yourself that it's actually fine is incredibly liberating.

6. Find your niche

I HATE cardio. Always have done, always will do. At school, I hated PE. I was also shit at PE. This led me to believe that I hated exercise, which was far from the truth. Had I not sheepishly ventured into that weights section, there's no way I would have stuck at the gym. I just can't deal with the burning throat, the feeling sick before I'm even tired, and the dreaded jiggling that comes with cardio. It makes me feel unfit and downright crappy. Lifting weights and using resistance machines, however, makes me feel powerful - like I can conquer the world. Yes, it's hard work, but it's a different kind of hard work than cardio; a kind I really enjoy. Consequently, my routines contain minimal cardio, for no other reason than because I don't like it. It's all about finding something that makes you feel empowered and strong, rather than just sticking to what you know and hate.

7. Plan ahead

Having a super-strict routine doesn't work for everyone. What I like to do is plan when I'm getting my workouts in week by week, rather than having a set day for each thing without fail. I tend to get my diary out on a Sunday and figure out what I've got planned during the week, before deciding when to fit the gym in. This way, you can set time aside for the gym on the days which you don't have much planned for. Pre-planning is one of the best ways to ensure you don't miss a workout due to being too busy.

5 things my Dad taught me

I think it's safe to say the last month or so has been a difficult one. After my Dad died in August, adapting to such a huge change in life has been really weird and frankly, confusing. For me at least, it's more than anything been a period of reflection; I don't think you realise how much of an impact a person has on you until they're no longer around. It was this that made me start thinking about everything my Dad taught me; it's amazing how he shaped my life in so many incredible ways. Honestly, this list could be way longer, but here are just the top five wonderful lessons that my Dad taught me.

1) To never be afraid to stick up for myself.

Being a relatively shy person, speaking out and standing up for myself has never been easy. In fact, shy or otherwise, I think this is something a lot of us struggle with; the fear (or hassle) of confrontation easily pushes us towards settling for less than we deserve. Growing up, and seeing the way my Dad always boldly stood up for what he believed was right and fair, certainly taught me a thing or two about making sure I'm treated with respect.

2) That grades don't mean as much as attitude.

As a younger child, I was a perfectionist to say the least. From an early age, I was almost obsessed with doing well at school, and developed an unhealthy tendency to compare my achievements with those of others. My Dad always knew this insecurity of mine, and regularly reassured me that grades really meant very little in comparison to attitude and work ethic. He certainly practised what he preached in this respect. At a young age my Dad left school without sitting any exams, to work as a miner, as many boys in his local area did. However after a few years, he decided he wanted to become a police officer. Through sheer determination and hard graft, rather than amazing academic achievements at school, he did just that. The fact that my Dad managed to have such a successful career doing what he loved, despite not being 'academic', really shaped my perspectives; I'm now much gentler on myself when it comes to grades. Dad proved to me, and always reminded me, that academics are only a part of, rather than the definition of success.

3) That actions speak louder than words.

Anyone who knew my Dad will know that he wasn't the 'emotional type' as such. He would rarely directly say "I love you" or anything along those lines, but he had ways of making it clear without even having to say a word. It was little things like always being the 'soft touch' parent when my brother and I were young, or the way he would always say "watch what you're doing" whenever we left the house as we got older. In fact, even near the end of his illness, he would never fail to tell us to watch what we were doing and to text him when we got home, every time we left the hospital. It's so easy for someone to say that they love you, but the actions that accompany or even replace that are much more meaningful and telling.

4) To never speak down to anyone.

I always used to love listening to Dad's stories about his time as a police officer. What always spoke volumes to me was that in every tale he told there was always one common theme; he would never say a bad word about anyone. It was obvious that in his job, he'd never speak down to people. He didn't ever see himself as any 'better' than anyone else, and I know he was really respected for it. This was one of the biggest lessons of my life; it made me realise that nobody is any 'higher up' than anyone else, and that most importantly we're all just human beings with our own unique lives, stories and experiences.

5) To live life to the full and take nothing for granted.

As anyone who knew my Dad will know, he was very much a 'live in the moment' sort of person, and he would always say "I'm here for a good time, not a long time." It was a phrase that if I'm honest, I never truly understood the meaning of until he was gone. No matter what card life had dealt him, he was always 100% positive, even when things were really bleak. He dealt with things in an almost superhuman way, and his catchphrase was 'crack on' (often accompanied with a smile and wink), no matter how trivial, or how heavy, the issue he was dealing with was.

60 things I wish I could tell my younger self

As we grow up, it's inevitable that we learn from our experiences and mistakes (especially in makeup/fashion, as I learnt the hard way)! I don't know about you, but I often find myself pondering over everything I've been through, and what it's all taught me. That's why I thought this week, it would be interesting to think about these lessons and realisations in a bit more depth. I was actually really surprised as to how many I could think of. Some are serious, some are more trivial, some you may relate to and others are more personal to me. Either way, I hope it makes an interesting read! So without further ado, her are 60 things I wish I could tell my younger self:

1. Social media will never solve your problems.

2. Your mental health won't improve until you respect your body and mind equally.

3. Stop worrying about your body; you haven't even finished growing yet.

4. Bra fittings are important.

5. The brown lip-gloss and purple eyeshadow combination will never look nice.

6. Your skin tone is not, and never will be 'sand', however much Dream Matte Mousse you apply.

7. Life is too short for uncomfortable heels.

8. Periods are nothing to be embarrassed about.

9. Your year 8 'history timeline' certainly isn't worth stressing over.

10. Be upfront about how you feel.

11. If someone upsets you, tell them - whether it's a stranger, parent, teacher, friend or anyone else. 

12. Smile at strangers even if they don't smile at you.

13. If you must fake tan your legs, fake tan your feet as well.

14. Never do anything that makes you feel uncomfortable in order to 'fit in'.

15. Don't suffer in silence, physically or mentally.

16. Going to the Doctor's is rarely as bad as you think it will be.

17. Acknowledge negative thoughts, but don't let them define you.

18. 2 litres of water per day will change your life.

19. Alcohol is only fun when you're in a good mood.

20. Physical and mental health are a team.

21. Revise well in advance.

22. Don't take it personally when people treat you badly - it's only a projection of their own feelings.

23. Teachers are human beings. Speaking and being honest with them will benefit you both.

24. Standing up for yourself won't make people hate you.

25. When it comes to success at school, self-care is equally as important as working hard.

26. Learn from your mistakes.

27. Most successful people start out by feeling like a loser.

28. Keep your friends close.

29. However much you try to, you will never enjoy cardio. Just do something else.

30. Physical strength becomes mental strength.

31. You are the only thing that has the power to make you feel bad.

32. Don't ever skip medication.

33. Life is too short to feel guilty for eating nice food.

34. A determined attitude is not everything, but it is powerful.

35. Don't stress over your indecisiveness - use it to your advantage.

36. Your journey is yours and everyone else's is theirs.

37. Comparing yourself to others is useless; everyone has unique strengths and weaknesses.

38. Get your split ends trimmed regularly.

39. School-College-Uni-Job isn't the only successful/viable life path.

40. Following your passions will make you feel more alive than anything else.

41. Work hard to be financially independent.

42. Do whatever you want at the gym and never feel self-conscious; nobody is looking.

43. Get up earlier.

44. Don't pretend you don't care about your Mam's opinion, because you do.

45. Don't let heartbreak stop you from loving wholeheartedly and without fear.

46. Learn to recognise confirmation bias in yourself.

47. You are the only person who can save yourself.

48. Don't let PE put you off exercise.

49. Let yourself feel every emotion your heart desires; they exist for a reason.

50. Stop pretending you don't enjoy Maths.

51. Taking a day to just look after yourself is more than ok.

52. The night out is not worth having to go into work hungover.

53. Don't underestimate the power of 9-10 hours sleep at night.

54. Don't underestimate the power of a good breakfast, either.

55.Your eyebrows look ridiculous.

56. Try to look after you nails.

57. Stop stressing about your exams; it won't change the result.

58. Resitting is not the end of the world.

59. Always put your phone down an hour before bed.

60. It's ok to be socially awkward - just own it.